Nervous

I want to sleep, but I can't. I'm so restless. I have all these nervouse butterflies in my stomach. I'm so exhausted and just can't sleep. It really doesn't matter how tired I am because in like 10 ish hours I'm gonna be so doped up on pain meds and anethesia that I'll be able to sleep for like 3 days straight. All I want is to be fixed, pain free, and able to be a normal flippin person. Cause as it is now I can't do like anything, and it's SO frusterating. I can't run, I can't go up stairs, I can't drive, I can't sleep, I can't shop, I can't even walk most times, at least not without being in pain and I'm really sick of it. I don't even know what else to say right now, I have so much going through my mind and I feel like my head is going to expload any minute.